The Velveteen Rabbit and Becoming Real

One of my favorite books is the Vel­veteen Rab­bit by Margery Williams.  It is a story about a stuffed rab­bit who is loved by a boy…it is about his jour­ney to become REAL.  Here is an excerpt.

What is REAL? “, asked the Rab­bit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nurs­ery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room.  “Does it mean hav­ing things that buzz inside you and a stick-out han­dle?

Real isn’t how you are made, “ said the Skin Horse.  “It’s a thing that hap­pens to you.  When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real. “

Does it hurt? “ Asked the Rabbit.

Some­times,” said the Skin Horse, for he was always truth­ful.  “When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.

Does it hap­pen all at once, like being wound up, “ he asked, “or bit by bit? “

It doesn’t hap­pen all at once, “ said the Skin Horse.  “You become.  It takes a long time.  That’s why it doesn’t often hap­pen to peo­ple who break eas­ily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be care­fully kept.  Gen­er­ally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been rubbed off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby.  But these things don’t mat­ter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to peo­ple who don’t under­stand.

I sup­pose you are Real? “ Asked the Rab­bit.  And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse might be sen­si­tive.  But the Skin Horse only smiled.

The Boy’s Uncle made me Real, “ he said.  “That was a great many years ago, but once you are Real you can’t become unreal again.  It lasts for­ever.

Some of the things I love the most about this book are about being Real…about being loved…and about hav­ing my eyes popped out and my hair rubbed off…and about being Real last­ing for­ever.  For me, most of my life, I did not feel Real.  Nor did I feel loved.  You notice, I said I did not “feel” loved.  I was loved by a lot of peo­ple.  But I didn’t feel it.  That was the mes­sage of the enemy ….that I was unloved and insignif­i­cant.  I kept try­ing dif­fer­ent things to make me Real.   I thought when I got mar­ried I would feel Real.  That didn’t work.  I thought, well surely when I become a Mom, I would finally be Real.  Nope.  Still empty.  So I moved on…I thought maybe I just needed another rela­tion­ship to make me Real.  More money? Nope.  I just kept search­ing.  Then I wasn’t search­ing any­more.  I was out of Hope.  No one was com­ing for me.  And I would never be real.  That is what I thought.  I thought the prob­lem was with me.  But in 2004, when I gave my heart to God, HE made me real.  He gave my life sig­nif­i­cance.  He called me beau­ti­ful.  And my being beau­ti­ful doesn’t have any­thing to do with what I look like on the out­side.  Yes, my hair is rubbed off and my eyes are popped out and I am loose in the joints.  But I am still beau­ti­ful.  The writer of Vele­teen Rab­bit was right in this sense.  “…once you are Real you can’t become unreal again.  It lasts for­ever. “  Thank you, God, for mak­ing me Real.

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4 Responses to The Velveteen Rabbit and Becoming Real

  1. Lynn Cochran says:

    I like this–it is so true. Do you know that it is still one of Lydia’s favorite sto­ries? It is
    all about becom­ing Real. So glad God has given you your sig­nif­i­cance. You really are
    beautiful–you really are loved. –Lynn

  2. Angela Ramshur says:

    I remem­ber you telling me this very story along time of go.. I remem­ber you read­ing me stuff you wrote over the years, and I told you that you needed to have them pub­lished bc you could always speak from the soul in your writ­ing.. It took me years to feel the very same way.. I had a good hus­band and thought it would fill that empty hole that was lack­ing, then I had my Chil­dren, and tought it would fill what was lack­ing.. and I did as the chil­dren was small and needed me, but then as they grew up and didn’t depend on me.. There was still so much that I had always pushed down and never con­fronted all the feel­ing I kept push­ing down as I would always look for what was lack­ing. I was rais­ing my chil­dren In church and going, but I always felt like I never was good enough for God.. so I ran away from him as well. when I turned 40 my fam­ily had me a sur­prised birth­day party, and My father was there.. It was the first time in my life that I was able to talk to my father about how angry I was with him for allow­ing the things that hap­pen to me in my child­hood, and It was the first time he told me how much he loved me, and how proud of me he had always been of me, and the women and mother that I had become.. It was the first step of my heal­ing. God showed me that he never left me, It was me that left him. I am so grat­ful that he is a mecy­ful God, and he is for­given. As you said about the lit­tle Rab­bit that is how I felt. I never felt pretty inside our out, no mat­ter how much I was ever told of how pretty I was or what a good per­son I was.. I just never felt it on the inside. Im so much smater now and so Great­ful! That God loves me when I can’t love myself.. Love you Leanna!! I have been truly grat­ful for when you came into my life, when I needed it the most. Sorry I got a lit­tle car­ried away.. Lol!! Love ya!

    • admin says:

      Thank you, Angie. I appre­ci­ate the com­ments. It encour­ages me. Thanks for shar­ing your feel­ings. I am work­ing on a book. As I post things, I am orga­niz­ing them into a file. Even­tu­ally, I will try and see if I can get them pub­lished. I love Beth Moore and Joyce Mey­ers. As you know, I had many holes I kept try­ing to fill up also. We all do. Our pas­tor is preaching/teaching from the book of Gala­tians on Grace. It has been very free­ing. You can lis­ten to them online free of charge. Or you can down­load them. They are very cheap. If you go to http://www.jamesriver.org and click on the media/resources area you will see sev­eral. Let me know if you can’t find them. I also enjoy read­ing your encour­ag­ing words on Face­book. There is a story to the post/poem I wrote on reunit­ing with a friend. I will tell you if you are inter­ested. It has been a very heal­ing expe­ri­ence. Love you.…Leanna…

  3. Angela says:

    Yes I would love to read it.. Just let me know. Luv ya! Angie

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